I have not written anything in a while as life has been keeping my on the run. Sometimes recently I feel as though I am not sure which way is ahead and where I have been. The one thought that keeps going through my head, is that something is pushing me in a new direction. Not quite sure which direction but get the feeling that is is different than where I have been before. Maybe the period being almost 2 years post diagnosis(July 3rd) is settling in to ask me "just what are you doing"?
Searching for answers that I'm told lie within still leads me to look outside, to music, books, and other's writings. I just finished a great little book titled, Finding My Marbles. The book can be read in a very short amount of time and offers a great message around the idea of losing your marbles and being trapped in what can sometimes be a disjointed life. Check it out and let me know what you think.
Some days, as I have written about, seem difficult to get the energy going to "make it a great day." Sometimes though, just when you think it will be an off day, something happens to bring a spark of hope, joy, laughter. It can be a phone call, a funny joke, a great customer service experience in an otherwise mundane stop by the grocery, or it could be an email that catches your eye. This is what grabbed me today, an email from David Bailey, fellow cancer survivor. Sign up on his email list, and you will receive incredible writings that he produces. It often amazes me that any one person could write such powerful verse, and often. Today he sent out a note titled, Just when I thought. I have included the words here, with his permission, as it spoke to me and hopefully will to you.
Just when I thought I had nothing left to say The new morning brought A few more words my way Again I was taught To celebrate each day it’s always worth a shot When hope shows up, let her stay Now me, I used to have a lot Of reasons I’d delay But time is shorter than I thought Don’t wanna let it waste away So at the break of every day I wanna live what I been taught I’ve seen the games that people play It don’t take much to get distraught And be that as it may I guess that’s why I still jot Down what I’m trying to say Even when I just cannot Be certain things will go my way But I’m sure there’s still a lot To do before I hit the hay Creeping up in my blind spot Is something we call yesterday Don’t let it be an afterthought There’s time to try another way Oh – and I almost forgot Shout it out with me: Anchors Away!
I only hope that I can celebrate each day, take the time to slow down and let life move through me versus trying to force myself on life. That way, the experiences that just happen to come by for a visit will have a place to stay, even if for a few moments.