Voice of the Patient

Seems like each doctor visit, each lab draw, each scan brings forth another opportunity to come in contact with another health care provider. Someone who has their own struggles, their own dreams and their own day to day chores that we have as a patient. What sometimes happens is that in the rush of work, keeping up productivity and being pressed for time to get through each test, lab draw and visit, the focus on the patient can be lost.

The focus on being present is something that many strive for in each and every day. The problem comes in when being a patient may not fall in line with the lack of focus that the health care provider may have at that moment when we need them. It might have been there for the previous patient and might be there for the next one, but if it's not there for us at that moment, all might be lost. Our voice needs to be heard, not necessarily loud but heard for what we need at that moment. Sometimes a smile, a thank you, an appreciative word might be all that's needed to bring the focus of the health care staff back into the moment.

The voice of the patient is so very important, no matter what stage we might be undergoing with our treatment. Take a moment to watch this video as it brings a lot of power and is worth a brief moment in time to watch. The video is from Urban Zen

Roly Rolon will give $15,000 to LIVESTRONG. http://VoteRoly.com

Sometimes you come across someone is works hard and tries to make a difference...this guy hits the mark

The Internal Voice

Some days it seems like time is standing still. Life's struggles are there, movement forward is lacking and the fear of the future is present. Take one day at a time, take small steps, 1 step at at a time and so on to make the enormous seem manageable. Momentum seems to be a key in keeping progress occurring and preventing staleness.

In between the doctor visits, IV drips and CT scans, life can seem so normal...is that so bad? Sometimes at those times the momentum can slow down and the internal struggle can build to resist eating right, not exercise, avoid meditation and all the things that can help in fighting the battle that cancer can bring. Often fear promotes movement and the feeling to change things from the status quo. An inspirational story read or heard of others can spark that inner fight and energy to keep moving forward. And isn't it great when this can cause the spark instead of a medical test result or a treatment session. Take the time to listen to the stories of the Running Voices and see if the momentum to keep up the fight is ignited.

I'm Tired

It's been quite a while since I last wrote. Life has been keeping me going in too many directions and too much irritation from sinus issues since June...still no excuse. I guess I am overall tired. Living with this chronic disease stuff has taken many turns as I am sure others have been through themselves. Recent rounds of Rituxan brought great hope and after the first round feeling great, the second brought less than that. The timing of another sinus infection concurrently with treatment made things worse than I would have liked but I must keep going. I keep having feelings of being tired and not just fatigue tired but tired of many of the challenges that have come my way.

Tired of...

• Antibiotics
• Doctor visits
• Taking time off from work for medical reasons and not vacation time
• Missing the opportunity for an extended vacation this summer in order to spend four weeks with an IV drip of Rituxan
• Reading information on Leukemia and Lymphoma is hope for something new to consider
• Being drained mentally and not feeling like having the fun I used to
• Not exercising as much as I have done due to the excuse of being too tired
• Working hard to eat a good diet in hopes of feeling better
• Waking up and realizing that I have cancer
• Going to sleep and remembering that I have cancer
• Seeing people enjoying life while I think of what I could be doing for myself to prevent symptoms from occurring
• Did I mention not having a summer vacation due to too much time spent from work for medical reasons?
• Just plain tired of having chronic cancer

So what should I do? I keep telling myself to keep strong, fight this stuff, find hope in the blessings that I have been given, enjoy each day and my family for the love that they give, be thankful for the work that I am able to do but still I feel tired. I am sure that this too shall pass but I am getting a little impatient. I do want to write more often and have been working on a book idea I have as I feel that I want to share more of my experience. I often find myself thinking of what I want to do with my life...I guess I should just live life and let the answers unfold as I go. But tonight I am tired so I think I'll get some sleep. Tomorrow is another day of hope.

Be The Match

Something to consider for all those connected to cancer

Just When You Think

I have not written anything in a while as life has been keeping my on the run. Sometimes recently I feel as though I am not sure which way is ahead and where I have been. The one thought that keeps going through my head, is that something is pushing me in a new direction. Not quite sure which direction but get the feeling that is is different than where I have been before. Maybe the period being almost 2 years post diagnosis(July 3rd) is settling in to ask me "just what are you doing"?

Searching for answers that I'm told lie within still leads me to look outside, to music, books, and other's writings. I just finished a great little book titled, Finding My Marbles. The book can be read in a very short amount of time and offers a great message around the idea of losing your marbles and being trapped in what can sometimes be a disjointed life. Check it out and let me know what you think.

Some days, as I have written about, seem difficult to get the energy going to "make it a great day." Sometimes though, just when you think it will be an off day, something happens to bring a spark of hope, joy, laughter. It can be a phone call, a funny joke, a great customer service experience in an otherwise mundane stop by the grocery, or it could be an email that catches your eye. This is what grabbed me today, an email from David Bailey, fellow cancer survivor. Sign up on his email list, and you will receive incredible writings that he produces. It often amazes me that any one person could write such powerful verse, and often. Today he sent out a note titled, Just when I thought. I have included the words here, with his permission, as it spoke to me and hopefully will to you.

Just when I thought
I had nothing left to say
The new morning brought
A few more words my way
Again I was taught
To celebrate each day
it’s always worth a shot
When hope shows up, let her stay
Now me, I used to have a lot
Of reasons I’d delay
But time is shorter than I thought
Don’t wanna let it waste away
So at the break of every day
I wanna live what I been taught
I’ve seen the games that people play
It don’t take much to get distraught
And be that as it may
I guess that’s why I still jot
Down what I’m trying to say
Even when I just cannot
Be certain things will go my way
But I’m sure there’s still a lot
To do before I hit the hay
Creeping up in my blind spot
Is something we call yesterday
Don’t let it be an afterthought
There’s time to try another way
Oh – and I almost forgot
Shout it out with me: Anchors Away!

I only hope that I can celebrate each day, take the time to slow down and let life move through me versus trying to force myself on life. That way, the experiences that just happen to come by for a visit will have a place to stay, even if for a few moments.

Live with hope

A Great Cause...Drumstrong

Sometimes you come across a very worthy cause and I hope you can take a few minutes to watch the video that describes a great benefit coming up this weekend just outside Charlotte NC. The event details are on the site http://www.drumstrong.org/home.htm